Watching a friend go through an unhealthy and abusive relationship can be scary and challenging. Whether the abuse in question is physical, emotional, economic, sexual, or verbal, you may be at a complete loss on the best way to help them. Sometimes the first instinct may be to “save them” from the relationship but that may not go well.
Protecting women and girls from men’s violence should be every man’s business. There is a growing awareness that men, in partnership with women, can play a significant role in ending violence against women.
You may be surprised to realize that many of the behaviors you live with everyday are actually considered emotionally abusive.
Many people are being emotionally abused without realizing it. Many wonder whether they are being abused but are confused as to what exactly emotional abuse is. As a way to help clear up any confusion you may have as to whether you are being emotionally abused, I present the most common tactics used by abusive people. The typical emotional abuser has an entire repertoire of tools he or she can use to manipulate and control their partner. While not every abuser uses these tactics in a deliberate, conscious way, many do.
“Why don’t they leave?” is often the first response posed to survivors, implying that they are to blame for the abuse.
When one has no knowledge or has never experienced abuse, it can be difficult to understand the deep emotional grip abusers have on their victims. That is why to simply leave is not as easy as going to the shops. A lot of safety planning, talking to trusted friends and being ready for a healthy life has to go in to creating an escape route.
Happy Holidays and New Year from Safe Speaks.
In most times when we talk about domestic violence, we tend to focus on physical, sexual and emotional abuse. Rarely does financial abuse come to mind. But why? Because financial abuse is less commonly understood or spoken about form of abuse. Sadly, this abuse or control of one’s access to family finances and assets is prevalent and occurs in up to 99 percent of domestic violence cases.
So, why are we not talking about it?
The fight against gender-based violence is no longer an individual or women’s fight but a fight for every person. Each one of us has a responsibility to take action in eradicating the gender and social norms that promote violence against women.
Violence against women is deeply rooted in gender-based discrimination, social norms that accept violence, and gender stereotypes that continue cycles of violence. Many efforts to address this vice have mostly concentrated on response efforts and paid less attention to primary prevention which is the key to eliminating violence against women and girls completely.
Coercive control is the first step in domestic violence. If we can identify it and stop it there, we can save lives.
